I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here!
by Furry Fidget
Summary: Ever wondered if Will Turner would eat chicken eyes? If Elizabeth Swann and Hermione Granger would be friends? If Jack would kill Cutler Beckett? Look no further, for this, and more! WARNING: Many arguments and the burning of rum.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of these movies. If I did, I would be a millionaire!**  
Ever wondered if Will Turner would eat chicken eyes? If Elizabeth Swann and Hermione Granger would be friends? If Jack could survive with no rum? Look no further, for this, and more! WARNING: Many arguments!

A leafy green jungle, vibrant with colourful birds and plants. Birdsong and clear blue skies. A blonde lady with a brilliant, white smile leans against a tree.

"Hello there! I'm your host, Sonia Waters, and welcome to this years: I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here! Our nine movie characters are placed in a jungle, and forced to undergo humiliating tasks. There will be one extra special guest movie character per day who will only feature for that day, and one movie character evicted per day. There can only be one winner, which is chosen by you at home! Let's welcome our first contestants, all the way from the Caribbean, it's Jack Sparrow, Will Turner, and Elizabeth Swann!"

Deafening applause welcomes the first three contestants, but Captain Jack Sparrow doesn't look very happy.

"There should be a Captain in me name somewhere, love. And stop grinning so much whelp, you look crazy. Apparently we're on live TV, whatever that is."

"Hey! Don't call me whelp." Will said crossly, folding his arms.

"Stop picking on Will, Jack. You're just jealous that I chose him instead of you-" Elizabeth is cut off by the host of the show.

"Yes, that's enough of that, thank you!" Sonia Waters laughed, "The next few weeks are certainly going to be exciting! Oh, I'm terribly sorry about your name, Captain Jack. I'll definitely remember next time!"

Captain Jack grins, and winks at her. "It's alright love."

Blushing, Sonia continues. "Moving on. Our next three contestants are trainee magicians from Hogscraft, sorry, er, Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizarding. Please welcome, Larry Potter, Ronald Weasel and Hermione Grange!"

The next three contestants enter, gazing at the jungle in awe. They have obviously never seen one before. Ron whistles and stares, transfixed by the size of it.

"Bloody hell Harry, this jungle is big. And green. Very green."

Hermione glares at him, and he falls silent. "Please don't mind him, he's not always that stupid." she says, rolling her eyes.

Sonia laughs, and says "We also have two of the four Pevensie children here, please give a big hand for Lucy and Edmund!"

Two children enter, in old fashioned clothing. Lucy, the youngest, exclaims, "This jungle really resembles the one in Narnia, by the ruins of Cair Paravell."

Her brother frowns. "No, this jungle is more like the one by Mr Beaver's house."

"Edmund! That jungle is more light green. This one is much darker."

"Please, be quiet." Jack interrupts, "Poor Sonia wants to get on with the show."

The host looks at him gratefully and continues. "And our final contestant, um." She whispers something into her earpiece. "Who is this guy? Max Goof. I'm sorry, who?"

The final contestant appears. He looks like Goofy, the Disney character. "Hi, I'm Max Goof. Haven't any of you heard of me?" Everyone looks at each other blankly. "There are two movies about me. I'm Goofy's son. You know, Goofy, from Disney? A goofy movie? I starred in it. There are 17 fan fictions about that movie on .net. Beat that!"

"Yeah, well there are about 18436 fan fictions about pirates of the Caribbean on there!" Captain Jack Sparrow retorts, showing off. "Beat that! And most of them are about me!"

Elizabeth Swann shoves him."That's not true! There's a special genre for me and Will. Called Willabeth. You don't have a genre."

"Excuse me, I do. One called Sparrabeth. Ha!" The pirate laughs at her expression. "I have way more fans than you. I have a following of fangirls! On the other hand, most people hate you."

Harry Potter is not going to be left out. "There are over five thousand Harry Potter fan fictions on that website. Also, I'm the chosen one, the boy who lived. That should count for something."

All the characters begin to argue about their comparative fame. Sonia bites her lip and ignores them, until she can take it no longer.

"THAT'S ENOUGH!" she yells, and several birds fly off above her. "Let's just relax. Better? OK then. Now we're all here, you can follow me to your camp."

The characters follow Sonia to a clearing in the jungle. "This will be where you stay. The tenth bed is for the extra special guest movie character, one that will change every day. Any questions? Yes, Captain Jack."

"Where's the rum?" he asks, scanning the camp.

"I'm sorry, but the producers have forbidden rum for the duration of the show." Sonia melts at his sorrowful expression, and whispers, "I can smuggle some in for you."

"Would you? Thanks love." he replies, watching her blush again.

"Any other questions? Yes, you, Hermione."

"Do you have any books?" "No, sorry. It's just the beds and a campfire. No more questions? Good. Tomorrow is day one of the show. I'll be back in the morning, with the special guest for the day, and your first challenge."

Captain Jack waves. "Night love. Have a good sleep." Sonia vanishes into the trees, and the movie characters are alone.

"Aww. Elizabeth, Jack fancies Sonia!" Will laughs, eager for revenge.

"She's a salty wench, that's for sure." Jack replies.

"Could you please remember that there are children present, Mr Sparrow." Lucy Pevensie pipes up. "In Narnia, we are not permitted to use such vulgar language."

"Captain. Captain Sparrow. Anyway, goodnight everyone!" Night falls and the characters sleep. Tomorrow, day one of I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here!

Note: Review with suggestions for challenges, or votes on to evict.

Or just to say hi. Or with constructive criticism. Or to say you liked it.

Flames will be used for the campfire, jungles can be cold!

I will try to post a new chapter often, depending on reviews and busyness.

Thanks for reading everyone! And a special thank you to Livvy-noir!

Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

It is morning in the jungle. 6am, to be precise. Everything is silent in the camp and everyone is sleeping peacefully.

Sonia is standing by the camp. "Hello, and welcome back to: I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here! Before the first challenge begins, let's take a look at what's happening right now in the camp."

Lucy Pevensie stretches and opens her eyes. "Edmund. What a beautiful morning! Let's play hide and seek!"

"Yay!" her brother replies, awake in an instant. "You hide, I'll seek."

Lucy hides under Elizabeth's bed. She accidentally nudges the duvet, and wakes Elizabeth.

Elizabeth wakes up and screams loudly, waking everyone else.

Captain Jack Sparrow yawns, and Sonia tries but fails not to notice his large brown eyes. "What time is it, whelp?"

"I wish you wouldn't call me that, Jack. It's six am." Will says, scowling.

"Bloody hell!" Ron rubs his eyes, and looks around. His arachnophobia, or fear of spiders, has kept him awake most of the night.

The children go to play hide and seek again. Jack goes back to sleep. Ron, Harry and Will chat about guy stuff. Max Goof, whom everyone ignores all the time, meditates on his bed. This leaves Hermione and Elizabeth.

"Don't you hate those annoying children?" Elizabeth sighs. "They make me want to..."

"I know. I can't concentrate on my book. My names Hermione by the way."

"Elizabeth Swann. And those pirates. Honestly. What are you reading?"

"A history of Hogwarts by Dinah Dewdrop. It's really fascinating. You can borrow it if you like."

"I'd love to." Elizabeth says, glad that she has someone to talk to.

At that moment, Sonia enters the camp, and tells everyone to sit on a couple of benches.

"Good morning everyone! Today we're starting with the first challenge!" she says breezily. "It's called The walk of doom. The rules are that you have to cross a bridge 200m up in the air with no safety equipment." Everyone is silent.

"What? We could die!" Hermione gasps.

"You agreed to come on this show. If you cross it, you win yourself a meal. Anyone who doesn't cross the walk of doom will go hungry. So, who's up for it?

"Not a chance. Come on Edmund. Let's go back to camp." The children run off.

"I hate Walks of doom." says Max Goof, following the children.

"Did I mention I'm afraid of heights?" Ron gulps, and flees back to camp.

"This is way too dangerous." Hermione follows him.

"If I fell off and died, there'd be nobody to kill Voldemort." Harry Potter is the last to go. This leaves Will, Elizabeth and Jack.

"I'll go first." Jack says cheerily. "Stop looking so green, whelp. Remember that sword fight we had? The one where we had to jump on and off those beams? Just like that."

He carefully crosses the walk of doom, almost falls to his death a couple of times, but regains his balance. He is followed by Will and Elizabeth. On the other side, Sonia is holding three baskets of food.

"One for you Will. Elizabeth, this is yours. And yours Captain Jack."

"Hey, Jack's basket of food is bigger." Will protests angrily.

"Thanks, love." the captain grins.

"I'm so hungry! Stupid show." Hermione says, sitting on the grass next to Elizabeth. In the camp, spirits are very low, due to the lack of food.

"You can share my food if you like, there's plenty here. Although the host gave Jack much more food than me." Elizabeth moans.

"We could steal some out of his basket." Hermione suggests. "After all, it's unfair to give one contestant privileges and not the others."

So, the girls sneak to Jack's bed, open the basket, and find...

"Rum?"

"The rules quite clearly stated that no alcohol is allowed." Hermione says indignantly.

"Let's burn it on the campfire!" Elizabeth decides an evil glint in her eyes.

Soon, a huge fire is burning, and by dinner time, when Sonia arrives with the surprise movie character, everyone is sitting around it.

"May I present the first surprise movie character...Lord Cutler Beckett." Sonia says, and there is a shocked silence as he emerges through the trees.

While Will Turner chokes on his tea, Elizabeth Swann narrows her eyes and Jack grips his gun, the other characters have no idea who he is.

"You're sup-supposed to be d-dead." Will splutters, and Lord Beckett adjusts his wig and smiles arrogantly.

"Am I not?" he asks, infuriating Jack.

"No stealing my lines." The captain growls angrily, and stalks off to his bed to retrieve the rum hidden there.

"Calm down everyone." Sonia laughs nervously, noticing Will and Elizabeth glaring at the new arrival. There is an awkward silence.

"So Mr Beckett," Lucy starts, but is interrupted.

"Lord Beckett, little girl. Chairman of the East India Trading Company and duly appointed representative of his majesty the king." he says haughtily. Another awkward silence. Then Jack reappears, looking furious.

"Right. Beckett. This is it. The last straw." Jack points his gun at his enemy. "What have you done with my rum?"

The children scream at the sight of the weapon, and the Harry Potter characters and Max Goof hide behind some bushes.

The Lord gives a condescending smirk. "I have no idea what you are talking about."

"It was me." Elizabeth says, "I burnt the rum on the fire."

"Noooooo! The rum! Why is the rum always gone? Why? You monster." Jack shouts, throwing the gun at her.

She ducks just in time, and the gun hits Cutler Beckett in the head. Immediately, paramedics rush in, and Cutler Beckett is taken away on a stretcher for medical attention.

While Sonia comforts Jack, Elizabeth and Will help the Harry Potter characters out of the bushes.

"I'm really sorry for helping to burn your rum, Captain Sparrow." Hermione says, and shoves Elizabeth.

"I'm not sorry. Rum is a vile drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels." Elizabeth scowls, and walks off, remembering the last time she burnt the rum.

"Thanks, Sonia love." Jack says, as she offers him a pack of tissues.

"Lord Beckett won't be coming back." she says. "He got concussion and died."

"Good riddance." he replies. "He was worse than Davy Jones."

"Get a good rest, and I'll see you tomorrow."

"Night love." Jack lays down as Sonia leaves the camp.

"Do you want to play snakes and ladders?" Edmund asks the others. Nobody can think of anything better to do.

They split up into three teams: Elizabeth and Hermione, Will, Harry and Ron, and Lucy and Edmund. Max Goof is not invited to play, and sulks on his bed.

The game is fiercely competitive, and by the end of it, Hermione end Elizabeth are not on speaking terms with the boys.

"You cheated." shouts Ron, as Elizabeth moves to square 100, winning the game.

"We did not."

"You're not allowed to climb up snakes." Will insists, banging his hand on the board.

"Yes you are. We won fair and square."

It is midnight when the game finishes, and the characters go to bed. The next day will bring another challenge, and another surprise movie character. There will also be the first eviction!

Note: More special thank yous go to blackshadow878, Selina Sparrow and Cead!  
Reviews help me to write as well as make me happy!  
Thanks for reading!

Top of Form

Bottom of Form


	3. Chapter 3

"Welcome back to, I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here!" Sonia says, as the contestants gather around the fire. It is ten 'O' clock in the morning, and time for the first evictions.

The producers have decided that three people will leave the show each day, just to make it more exciting.

"The first three people to leave the show are..." Sonia left a very long and dramatic pause. "Harry Potter, Ron Weasley and Lucy Pevensie."

Hermione hugs her friends sadly, and Will Turner promises to keep in touch with them. Edmund doesnt seem too bothered about his sister leaving. The others don't care at all, and remain seated by the fire. Harry, Lucy and Ron leave the jungle forever.

"And, I have the surprise movie character for today." Sonia continues, and everyone looks expectantly at her. "Please welcome... Commodore Norrington."

"James!" Elizabeth cries, and runs over to hug the Commodore. "I've missed you so much!" Will tries, but fails, not to look jealous.

Norrington sits down on the log next to the others, and Will glares at Elizabeth.

"What?" she responds angrily.

"You know I hate the commodore." Will pouts. There is an uncomfortable silence, while Jack smirks.

"Anyway," says Sonia. "Todays challenge is to eat disgusting animal parts. The competitors will be... Will Turner, Commodore Norrington and Max Goof!" A huge tray is brought in, it holds bowls of eyeballs and entrails.

"Ewwww! That's gross!" yells Max Goof. The Commodore looks at Will.

"How about a bet? To make things a bit more exciting. Whoever eats the most gets to kiss Elizabeth." Norrington suggests.

"But I already get to kiss Elizabeth." Will moans.

"Stop moaning, whelp." Jack says, rolling his eyes. "Just do the challenge."

Max Goof, Commodore Norrington and Will Turner line up, and bowls are placed in front of them.

"The one who eats the most, wins. If anyone finishes the bowl, the challenge immediately stops. The food is a mix of chicken eyeballs, fish livers and assorted entrails." Sonia sits down on the log next to Jack. "You can begin... Now!"

Max Goof picks up an eyeball and stares at it, while the Commodore uses a fork to get an intestine. To Will's dismay, he begins to eat, steadily emptying the bowl. Not to be outdone, Will starts to chew on an eyeball.

"Go James! You can do it!" cheers Elizabeth, causing Will to spit out the eye.

"Ha! Bad luck whelp!" Jack smirks from the log, making Sonia, Hermione and Edmund laugh.

"I win!" Norrington yells, showing the others his empty bowl.

"It looks like the Commodore has won!" Sonia giggles at Will's face as Norrington passionately kisses Elizabeth. Will looks a cross between furious, and sick from eating the disgusting meal. "In second place is Will, and Max Goof is last."

When Will throws up in some nearby bushes, Sonia and Jack are laughing so hard that they can't even sit up straight. Hermione and Edmund, bored, go to play hide and seek with Max Goof.

"The whelp, he-" Jack splutters, his hat falling off from laughing so hard. It lands on Sonia's lap, and she puts it on her own head.

"Poor Will. I thought Elizabeth loved him." Sonia says, watching Will approach Elizabeth and Norrington.

"It looks like there's going to be an argument!" Jack grins as Sonia lays her head on his chest. "Shh love, I want to hear this!"

Will pokes Norrington in the chest, and Jack sees a sword behind his back. This could get interesting. Elizabeth sees Will, and guiltily runs off to play hide and seek with Hermione and the others.

"Norrington," Will growls, holding the sword to the Commodore's chest. Norrington produces his own sword, and they begin to fight.

"I should probably stop them." Sonia bites her lip as Will furiously attacks the Commodore.

"Oh, come on love. I'll bet you this ring that Will wins." Jack says, taking off one of his rings.

"You're on." Sonia laughs, shaking his hand. Will was the better swordsman, but she had noticed a protruding root next to his foot. Sure enough, Will trips and Norrington holds the sword to his throat.

"I win again!" Norrington shouts, while Jack hands over the ring to a triumphant Sonia.

"OK, Norrington wins himself a meal. All the rest of you get nothing. Except the Captain, of course." Sonia brings out two baskets and hands one to each of them.

"How come Jack always gets food when the rest of us get nothing?" asks Edmund in a whiney voice. Hide and seek has finished, and he is sitting on the log with Hermione and Elizabeth.

"Because I like Jack." Sonia says. "You'll get another chance to win food tomorrow. Unless you get evicted first. Then, you can eat all you want. Goodnight everyone!"

Note: Thanks to everyone who reviews! Six constants remain, so there are just two days left! These contestants are: Hermione, Elizabeth, Edmund, Max Goof, Will and Jack. Who will win?


	4. Chapter 4

It is day three, and time for the second lot of evictions. Sonia and the movie characters sit on the logs. While Max Goof, Edmund, Elizabeth, Will and Hermione look nervous, Jack looks very relaxed and confident.

"And, the next two people to be evicted from I'm a famous movie character 2011 are..." Sonia leaves another unbearably long pause. "Edmund and Will." Elizabeth and Will hug tearfully, but secretly are glad to be separated after the argument yesterday. Then the two characters return home.

"How is Max Goof still here?" asks Hermione angrily, pointing at him. "Nobody's ever heard of him. Seriously. Who would vote for him?"

"No idea." Sonia replies. "There is still one last person to evict. It will be the loser of the next challenge who leaves. You will race to the bottom of Leaf glade hill. The bad news is, you will each be on a skateboard."

"I love skateboarding!" Max Goof shouts, jumping up from the log. Hermione and Elizabeth glare at him until he sits down.

"I don't know what a skate board is." Jack says sadly.

"Don't worry, you don't have to do any humiliating challenges like this one. You're automatically through to the final." Sonia says, causing the other contestants to complain loudly.

"Why do we have to do it if Jack doesn't?" Elizabeth pouts, stamping her feet. "That's really unfair."

"Pirate!" Jack sticks his tongue out at her.

Half an hour later, Elizabeth, Hermione and Max Goof line up on Leaf glade hill. Jack and Sonia sit on deck chairs at the foot of the hill, relaxing with exotic looking cocktails.

"Ready, steady, go!" Sonia says, sipping her drink. The three contestants set off, whizzing down the hill. Max Goof is an expert skateboarder, and reaches the bottom in the fastest time, doing all sorts of impressive tricks. Elizabeth is next, and Hermione last, flailing her arms around her head as she desperately tries to keep her balance.

"Bye Hermione." Sonia says disinterestedly, stirring her cocktail. "Can you pass the rum Jack?"

"I'm going to miss you!" Elizabeth tells Hermione. "That Max Goof is a ridiculous nobody, and Jack is infuriating."

"I'll write to you!" Hermione says, hugging her friend, and makes her way home. Now, just Max Goof, Jack and Elizabeth remain.

"We now have the special guest character for the day! Please welcome... A mr, um, Veldimoore. No, that's not right. Voldemooqu. Voldimot. Voldemort!"

"How dare you insult my honour, you ignorant muggle!" Voldemort booms, entering the clearing. "Address me as he who must not be named, or feel the wrath of my anger!" Elizabeth squeals and hides behind a bush, followed by Max Goof.

"What's a muggle?" Sonia whispers to Jack.

"Never heard the word love. He's clearly crazy, savvy?" Jack replies. "Hey, snake face, what's a muggle?"

"Insolent mortals, you dare insult me?" Voldemort replies, pulling out a stick. "Prepare to die!"

"What's that? It looks like some twig." Jack asks Sonia.

"I think it's one of those sticks you use for toasting marshmallows." Sonia guesses, and produces a bag of marshmallows from under her chair. "Everyone, get a stick and toast marshmallows!"

"Yay!" chorus Elizabeth and Max, lighting the campfire and finding sticks to use.

"It's a wand." Voldemort says loudly, not used to being ignored.

"Don't worry, I'm sure you can still use it for marshmallows." Sonia says kindly, sticking a marshmallow on the point of the wand and toasting it on the fire.

"That's my wand, you dirty muggle." Voldemort snatches his wand back and throws the marshmallow into the fire.

"Don't talk to Sonia like that." Jack threatens, scaring Max and Elizabeth, who are peacefully sitting around the campfire.

"Right. That's it." Voldemort shouts, pointing his wand at Jack. "Inscius immotus." Suddenly Jack falls back onto the ground, and a stunned silence descends over the camp.

Note: Gasp! Cliffhanger! What has happened to Jack? Who will win? Find out the answers in the final chapter... More thanks you to x-Pick'n'Mix-x, SelenaRoX and Cead! Have some virtual marshmallows! If you don't like marshmallows, then you can choose something else.


	5. Chapter 5

"Jack, Jack, talk to me. Are you alright? Please, wake up." Sonia begs, tearfully shaking him. Voldemort has just been arrested for assault and unlawful use of magic, and paramedics are arriving.

"What exactly did Voldemort say?" One of the paramedics asks Elizabeth, and she struggles to remember.

"Inscius immotus. Or something similar." she guesses, and tries to remember the small amount of Latin she was taught as a girl. "Its Latin for unconscious, I think. Jack's going to be fine."

Sure enough the pirate soon regains consciousness, and after a good nights sleep is back to his normal self.

The final day and the show can continue. Elizabeth, Jack, Max and Sonia sit on the logs.

"Today, we will find out the winner of I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here 2011!" Sonia says. "There will be no surprise movie character today, as they cause way too much trouble."

She shudders, remembering how Cutler Beckett died, Commodore Norrington had a sword fight with Will, and Voldemort attacked Jack. Yes, surprise movie characters were not a good idea.

"However, we will hold a final challenge before the results. Jack is excused on medical grounds. The challenge is to swim across the lake in a monkey costume."

Moaning, Elizabeth and Max Goof go to get changed, leaving Sonia and Jack to set up their deck chairs beside the lake.

"Do you know the results yet?" asks Jack, struggling with the chair. "Stupid deck chair." 

"No, I have no idea who's going to win. I get given an envelope, and the name of the winner is inside." Sonia replies, "You have to undo the black clip on the side of the chair. There, now push it."

"Thanks love. It has to be me." Jack says, watching Max Goof jumping into the water, and flailing around in the lake. "There's no way that idiot is going to win. How has he even reached the final?"

"I don't know." Sonia sighs. "Maybe he has a large family and they all vote for him." She is going to miss Jack once the show is over.

"I win!" Elizabeth cries, climbing out of the lake and dancing in her monkey costume.

"That's not fair." Max Goof shouts from the middle of the lake. "She pushed me underwater when she went past. And now I'm drowning. Someone help me!"

Once the paramedics rescue Max Goof, everyone gathers for the results.

"The winner of I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here 2011 is..." Sonia says, opening the envelope. What? No. No! No way. You have got to be kidding, she thinks, staring at the name. Max Goof. Max Goof, the winner? Sonia thinks fast.

"The winner is... Captain Jack Sparrow!" Sonia announces, and as balloons and streamers descend from the sky, she tears the piece of paper into little bits, then swallows them.

As TV crews and interviewers crowd around Jack, cameras flashing, Elizabeth angrily makes her way out of the jungle. Max Goof walks up to Sonia, who is standing alone in the darkness.

"Let me see that card. The one with the winner's name on it." Max Goof growls angrily, and Sonia takes a step back. Maybe he rigged the vote, she thinks, seeing the crazed look in his eyes.

"I just dropped the card on the floor." she lies, guiltily staring at the floor. Suddenly, Max Goof leaps forwards and twists her arm behind her back.

"Listen here, Missy. I won this show. Got it? Everyone always says I'm not good enough. Well, I am going to prove them wrong." Her arm stinging with pain, Sonia looks around for someone who can help. But Jack has been swallowed up by a crowd of paparazzi, and is too far away to shout to.

"Max, listen. You are good enough, prove it by letting go of my arm. You're hurting me." Sonia sniffs.

Max Goof just gives a manic laugh, and grips harder, making Sonia yelp with pain. "I've had enough. My films always flop, I get laughed at by everyone. I just wanted to win something, for once. You ruined that for me. Now, I will have revenge!"

Suddenly, Max falls forward, someone has hit him on the back of the head. Behind him, stands Elizabeth, holding an empty bottle of rum.

"I came back to get my suitcase." she says and Sonia hugs her, tears dripping down her face. Max Goof's breakdown and losing Jack have been hard to deal with.

Then, Jack reappears from the crowd of photographers and media people, and oblivious to what has just happened, he awkwardly says,

"Sonia love. I've been thinking about how much I enjoy your company, and I don't want to go back to the Pearl without you. Would you consider joining my crew? We have a vacancy, as Cotton got eaten by a giant squid. I'm sure Anamaria would like to have another woman around, and you seem more than capable of the work."

Sonia stares at him for a minute, slaps him around the face for not noticing she was in trouble or rescuing her, then tearfully replies,

"I'd love to join your crew."

Jack looks baffled for a second, but quickly recovers. "I didn't deserve that!" he tells the media people, and he, Elizabeth and Sonia link arms and walk out of the jungle forever.

The End!

Note: Infinitely huge thank yous go to QueenCobraWing, SelenaRoX, Cead, x-Pick'n'Mix-x, WWE-Little-Angel and everyone who added this to favourite stories/story alerts, ect. If you enjoyed reading this, please review, I'll give you marshmallows!

It's been great fun to write and perhaps there will be a sequel one day... Watch this space!


	6. What happened next!

Note: Hi everyone! As I really cannot seem to find the time/ideas for a sequel yet, I thought it might be nice to catch up with our favourite characters a few months after I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here ended. Prepare for a special one off show, with sedatives, pirates and two hyperactive children. Enjoy!

"Hello and welcome to, I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here 2011, what happened next!" the voice rings out across the studio. "I'm your host for this evening, Daphne Jones."

The studio lights come on, to reveal a row of comfortable looking chairs and a small table. Daphne is seated on the chair at the very left. She's a small woman, with short dark hair, lots of jewellery and a sparkly red dress.

"Tonight, we'll find out what happened to all the characters involved on the show, three months on. So if you were wondering if Sonia really joined Jack's crew, where Max Goof went after his mental breakdown or if Elizabeth and Will ever made up after their argument, you can find out now!" The audience applaud loudly as Daphne takes a deep breath.

"Let me remind you that this, like all of our other shows, is live, so anything can happen here tonight. So, our first guests are a pirate who captured the nation's heart and the fantastic host of the show. Please welcome our winner, Captain Jack Sparrow and the wonderful Sonia Waters!"

The audience cheer loudly as Jack and Sonia sit down next to Daphne. While Jack looks his usual self, Sonia has changed a lot since the end of the show. Her once perfectly neat blonde hair is longer and untidy, and she is wearing a white shirt and trousers.

"Hi, it's great to see you two again! Captain, is it true that Sonia joined your crew?" Daphne asks.

"Yes, she did. She's the new cooper." Jack grins.

"The what?" Daphne questions.

"Cooper. I make barrels, and look after all the supplies on the ship." Sonia explains. Seeing the disdainful look on Daphne's face, she continues, "It may not be the most glamourous job, but I'm really enjoying the freedom of a pirate's life. I've learnt a lot. I used to be obsessed with clothes and celebrities, but now I can see there's more to life than that."

"Alright then." Daphne looks unconvinced. "Sadly, Will and Elizabeth Turner couldn't join us today. Have you seen them recently?"

"Yes, we visited Port Royal just the other week." replies Sonia. "They're both fine, the blacksmith business is booming, so they're making a tidy profit."

"That's nice. What have you both been doing since the show ended?" Daphne asks.

"Oh, searching for buried treasure, sailing uncharted waters, having loads of incredible adventures, you know, the usual pirate activities!" Sonia laughs.

"We visited the fountain of youth." Jack continues. "That was fun, wasn't it love."

"Except for that bilge rat Angelica." Sonia glares angrily at Jack.

"Hey, that's not fair." Jack replies hotly. "I liked her."

"She's a treacherous, cold hearted, mutinous, evil bilge rat." Sonia explodes. "She tried to kill me three times!"

"You only hate her because you're jealous." Jack retorts.

"Jealous? Of her? She-" Sonia is cut off by Daphne, who looks rather embarrassed.

"Ok then, shall we move on?" Daphne says awkwardly.

"Sorry Jack." Sonia hugs him. "I might have been a little hasty there."

"You were." Jack sulks. "But I forgive you.

"And?" Sonia and Daphne look expectant. Jack glares at them for a few seconds, then gives in.

"I'm sorry too."

"Good!" Says Daphne happily. "Now, one last question. As I know all the viewers at home are dying to know, are you two an item?"

"No, we're just friends." They both say it at the same time, then burst out laughing.

"Really good friends. Sonia's one of the few people I can trust completely." Jack smiles at her. "We have a lot of fun together."

"Thank you Sonia Waters and Captain Jack Sparrow for coming in to talk to us." As Jack leaves with Sonia, the audience cheer loudly, then an expectant hush falls over the studio.

"Now, you may remember two children who went out of the competition in the early stages, but not before they had managed to infuriate the other characters, and all the viewers at home. Please, give a big hand for the winners of the most annoying children of the year award, Edmund and Lucy Pevensie!" The children run over to the chairs and start bouncing up and down.

"Please stop that." Daphne begs. "Behave yourselves. You are on live television."

"Alright, you don't need to shout at us." Lucy reluctantly sits down beside her brother.

"So, what have you two been doing?" Daphne asks.

"Well, we were awarded the most annoying children of the year award, it was great!" Edmund yells. "We beat Justin Bieber and that girl from Britain's got talent."

"And we have our own TV show!" Lucy continues. "It's called 'Luce and Ed in the house'. It's a game show where the contestants have to-"

"Ok, I think we've got the picture." Daphne interrupts. "So are you glad that you were in I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here?"

"Definitely! It was wicked!" Lucy shouts, jumping onto the floor and running around the chairs.

"Wonderful. Thank you, Lucy and Edmund." Daphne says.

"Aren't you going to ask us anything else?" Edmund frowns.

"No, I don't think so. Honestly, I didn't think it was possible, but you two are even more annoying up close." Daphne gives a sigh of relief as the children sprint out of the studio.

"Now, please welcome our next guest, Max Goof, who shot to super stardom when he assaulted the host, Sonia Waters, on the final day of the show."

Max Goof is escorted into the studio by no less than five bodyguards. Most of the audience boo and hiss at him, and pieces of rotten fruit narrowly miss his head as he sits down.

"Hello Max." Daphne says slowly, as if talking to a baby. "It's so lovely to see you! So tell me, what have you been up to since I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here ended?"

"They locked me up!" he shouts dementedly, flailing his arms wildly. "Me! Max Goof! In an asylum! I deserved to win, I was going to win!"

"Are the allegations that you cheated by fixing the vote true?" Daphne asks.

"I only wanted to win something, for once in my life. My films flop at the box office, my single wasn't even in the top fifty chart, I need to borrow money from my dad when I want to buy clothes."

"I'm sorry Max, but there's no excuse for cheating." Daphne scolds.

"But Sonia cheated by saying that Captain Jack Sparrow won. Nobody seems to mention that." Max pouts. "Anyway, as I was saying. My mother died when I was very young, and my father raised me all by himself. He used to give great barbecues. I wanted to act since I was only three years old, and I-"

As Max drones on and on about his life, Daphne signals to one of the bodyguards, who pulls out a huge syringe and injects some colourless fluid into Max's arm.

"And at the age of ten, I starred in..." Max mutters, before his eyes close and he rests his head on the back of the chair.

"Don't worry, he's just unconscious." Daphne confirms. "These men are going to return him to the asylum for the care and attention he needs."

"Our next guests are three wizards from a magic academy. Please welcome Harold, Ronald, and Hermione!" Daphne announces. "What have you three been up to since you were voted off the show?"

"Oh, you know, saving the world from Voldemort, fighting the forces of evil." Hermione says.

"Didn't that Voldemort appear as a special guest in episode four?" Daphne asks.

"Yes, he did. He used magic on that pirate and got arrested." Ron replies. "But he broke out of prison, and it's up to us to stop him."

"Great." Daphne says disinterestedly, inspecting her nails. "One more question, because you three are very boring."

"Hey! We have seven bestselling books and films about us." Harry says, glaring at her.

"Well, I liked the pirates of the Caribbean films better. Yours were, I don't know, a bit angsty and depressing." Daphne says. "All my favourite characters got killed in book seven. Anyway, my last question is for Hermione. Do you still see Elizabeth Swann? You were good friends in the jungle."

"Yes, I do." Hermione replies. "We go to a book group every Sunday afternoon."

"Thank you, Harry, Ron and Hermione! Sadly, that's the end of our show tonight, but I can exclusively reveal that another series of I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here has been commissioned!" Daphne squeals as the audience cheer happily.

"The madness continues in just a few months, when another twelve characters enter the jungle. Some will be the same as from this series, but there will be some big surprises in store! I can't wait! Until then, goodbye from me, Daphne Jones, and all the characters who came here tonight! Thank you for watching." And with that, the studio lights dim and the audience depart.

Note: Once again, thank you to everyone who enjoyed I'm a famous movie character, get me out of here 2011! Wonderful people who reviewed and deserve many presents: QueenCobraWing, writelivelove, Cead, x_PicknMix_x, SelenaRoX and WWE-Little-Angel. Love you all and see you next time!


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